Breast cancer, Cancer, Empowerment, Faith, Fear, Healing, Hope, poetry, Stories, Writing

Empowerment through Poetry

 

And-in-the-end-its-not

Lately thoughts of cancer have floated through my mind. The word is still with a lowercase ‘c’, but it’s there, in my daily life.

I’ve learned to not stuff disturbing thoughts down into my body or heart. They always pop up somewhere, like an evil jack in the box.

When I try to stuff the thoughts, the feelings associated with the word ‘cancer,’ morph into capital letters until the word is entirely in CAPS like it’s screaming out.

I remember a phrase I read from a book whose author I can’t remember:

Feelings are energies that can be moved and transformed.

When I first read that sentence I thought “Wow, that’s empowering.” I get to direct my feelings, move them around, and create something else.

I can stop the stories in my head and create a new story.

So I grab a piece of paper and write out my thoughts, examine them, and try to figure out if I’m feeling anger, grief, fear, or all three.

Many times it’s not necessary to find ‘the answer,’ only to feel the feelings and examine the threads that make the word stand up in my mind.

Sometimes I thread those words together until they become something else, something not scary or ominous.

 

Lowercase cancer

I remember when

cancer had me by the breast

the slash, poison, burn

 a bald toxic dump.

Nurtured by family

powered by faith

seeds of hope planted

until a garden grew

a wasteland no more.

Dare you to try again

been there and back

you will meet defeat

little c

because now I’m not afraid

to die, after I’ve lived

If poetry isn’t your thing, you can also examine or deal with negative feelings by practicing meditation, deep breathing, journaling, listening to your favorite music, drawing, or reading something inspirational.

The point is you can stop the negative feelings in your head and create a new story in your heart.

Make new stories this weekend.

Encouragement, Grief, Healing, Self Care, Wisdom

How Tears Lead Us Home

 

Crying can be good for you
Crying can be good for you

How do tears lead us home?

 

There is crying from sadness, grief, anger, frustration,

and sometimes there is crying for happy.

I imagine different rooms in a house, with appropriate decor (gray’s, brown’s, red’s), with soft blankets and big cushy pillows

where we can go to cry our eyes out.

But I’d gather most of us spend time stifling the times in which we want to cry.

I do that myself sometimes and end up feeling miserable, guilty, and congested.

Sometimes I feel dumb for even wanting to cry.

That is until I came across this blog post from Annie Lalla, which gave me much relief and a new philosophy.

Here are some excerpts (emphasis mine).  I encourage you to read the full post on her website-she’s awesome.

Crying is a secret sacred place, a place of solitude.

It’s not a space we navigate with much finesse; there are few maps on how to cry.

Many conflicting feelings arise around tears -fear of looking weak, of being too emotional, guilt for making others feel bad, relief at sharing pent-up thoughts, joy at being seen in our truth.

To cry is to render your heart naked, undefended & utterly exposed to the world. No wonder it is shrouded in so much terror, secrecy and shame.

Tears…your tears, are the way your body shows you what’s important to you. Holding them back is a form of self-deception and a withhold of your deepest truth. When I feel that familiar proto-tear sensation rising up in my throat, I know I always have a choice in that moment:

to cry or…to lie.

Every uncried tear is a lost epiphany, a missed lesson, a moment that failed at aliveness.

Each time you cry you release ancient tears from all the moments you didn’t let yourself cry in the past.

No tear is ever wasted, each one holds in it’s liquid infinity, 1o years worth of therapeutic salve.

Knowing this, I now look forward to opportunities to cry…once the portal is open, I let as many drops out as I can. The more I cry, the more alive I feel.

Tears teach us what we actually care about, they point at what matters the most, they take us back to a place of innocence & transparency.

Tears lead us home.

From a place of frustration, anger, or grief, we can release the tears inside, feel the pain, examine it, and do some self talk, without any guilt or shame.

Think of crying as part of self-care and good mental health.

This attitude sure beats stifling our feelings and tears and becoming congested, or overeating, over drinking, or being in denial.

Have a great weekend and I hope you remember that it’s healthy to release yourself with a good cry.

 

Healing, Nuturing, poetry, Strength

Stardust and Healing – Poem

 

https://www.flickr.com/x/t/0097009/photos/garlandcannon/4295147009/
Stardust- Valentine of the Universe by Jan

Stardust

 

In my dreams,

I traveled to the stars

through the black darkness,

to the heavens of the infinite,

 

gathering stardust

in outstretched arms,

bits of  future self, which

flowed over my heart.

 

Glowing embers

surrounded a dying organ,

encouraging, nurturing,

restoring love.

 

Warmth growing,

healing the self

bringing me back

to life.

 

 

Encouragement, Healing, poetry

Sunrises and Healing – Poem

Sausalito Sunrise by David Yu
Sausalito Sunrise by David Yu

 

Beneath wet lashes

the moon, round with longing,

floated towards heaven-

a luminous orb.

In an arc against an indigo sky,

embroidered with crystals,

radiance ascended into a soft glow 

caressing a night of sighs.

Its ardent light beckoned

to the miracles of the universe

to hope and peace

until the tears dried 

and the sun rose,

again.